See me see trouble in this abuja oh

That's how i sat quietly in my hotel room today, sober and thinking of where and how to find money oh...

when hunger started to wire me, so i call room service and ask what's available for lunch...

She reels off all sorts and i just simply say please can i have white rice and egusi with goat meat?

Then she says "ah that would be vegetable rice and egusi" i say nope just "white rice and egusi".

she insists that the white rice would just be garnished with a few vegetables and i'd like it so i say ok then.

next she says how about the starter? we have goat pepper soup and cream of mushroom or onion(can't remember right now) soup.

At this juncture me i ask how much is lunch? and she says N1800 one thousand eight hundred naira only

so i say ok bring the pepper soup then, i can afford N1800 abi?

Then the lady again says i will GIVE you a small bottle of water, and fruit slices as well as ice cream, which flavour do you want? as well.

Yours truly now....

Says ah no problem. i'll be waiting

only for food to arrive half an hour later and i see bill of N3850 Three thousand eight hundred and fifty naira tori Olorun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My eyes nearly popped out. Apparently plus pepper soup, plus ice cream plus fruit slices everything na extra money.

Promptly told the waiter to take it back oh..

And he tells me oh it's not possible etc

i sha sign the bill and sit down to think of the next thing to do.

In the interim i open the food and believe me na fried rice these people give me to chop egusi soup with bitter leaf!!!

You can just imagine the kind of lunch i am swallowing right now!!!!!

Bitter sweet i tell you....

Last night too, i went to buy suya and i tell the guy "please put plenty onions" and the gentleman goes ahead to slice TWO bulbs of onions into my N500 suya.

You can just imagine what i had for dinner, onions with a few pieces of meat...

I'm just about ready to head back to my country of Lagos biko!!!!!!!!!!!!!