Monday 29 August 2016

Accepting just as it is?

My sister sent me a random message today! The message was disjointed and just fueled my annoyance a bit.

It was a supposedly congratulatory message even though the word congratulations didn't feature in it! Three weeks after my little one arrived. Am i such a bad sibling?

The relationship has been strained for years i admit. I have my shortcomings but the gap has largely stemmed from her not accepting her wrong doing and insisting she didn't behave so badly. Unfortunately my other siblings haven't been so vocal on the subject. I have and i have even attempted several reconciliatory meetings. I gave up after the last one where she kept her nose in the air and still kept justifying her actions!!!!

I feel disappointed particularly in the light of the many sacrifices i made for her over the years. Again i'm sure along the way i probably had a few slip ups to. And i have apologised for as many as i have remembered.

Her husband said to me once that she feels aggrieved on some matters and i asked him how i was to make ammends if she doesn't bring it to the fore!

my older brother says that we must operate with people on thier level and be accepting of people as they are! So for eg if she insists that on the matter that caused the strain and some of her subsequent actions she is right then we should let it be and operate with her on that level.

So i ask myself, am i supposed to respond to her message and pretend it doesn't upset me????????

Really i feel soooo sooo annoyed here right now!

Again i'm likely to be told to suck it up after all her greeting me or not greeting me doesn't change the price of fish in the market!

But should this be so?????

Phew..... it's all out! Feel better somewhat

5 comments:

Mojisola said...

Sisters, the best of friends and the worst enemies...

You didn't tell us what happened. Obviously, you are both still hurting from whatever it was. Did you snatch her boyfriend and marry him? Did you ruin a relationship between her and the man of her dreams? Maybe she blames you for calling him out?

I agree with your brother, just let it go. Not saying that you should apologize but she sent you a congratulatory message. Stop trying to decode the message and accept the congratulations as her olive branch. Thank her for it and since she has made the first step towards reconciliation it is now your turn to say something nice.

Good Luck!

Beautiful said...

Awwwww *hugs love*
First of all - Congratulations!!!

Reply and say - thanks dear sis.

Ignore the anger....you being upset gives her power over your emotions. Is it really worth it to have someone control your emotions/mind/actions? I don't know what happened and i'm sure it's painful but you would need to try and close the entire book not just the chapter.

Kisses dear.

Molara Brown said...

Lets start with congratulations on the arrival of the little one.

As regards your sister, I think both of you need to air your grievances, one party might not admit to the wrong doing...but you need to know what exactly you are holding against each other from there you can move on to the next stage.

You should acknowledge her message and just let that one slide.

Chi said...

sisters fight and love all the time. I can imagine how you feel knowing l have three sisters myself and sometimes we are all not on the best terms but we have to make up for it and know that at the end of the day. We need each other. I wish you all well in the decision you take and hopefully your sister will come around knowing there is a cute baby involved and she is an Aunt.

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