Tuesday, 22 November 2011

My girl -Suliat


So i recently(few months back to be specific) hired a house manager :D aka  help.

She's been quite helpful. My issues with her are minimal which is rare in these parts. She's 22 and saving to  "do her freedom" in photography.

Like i said she seems quite ok when i consider the other extremes, however the other day this happened.....

I'll be relaying it in pidgin and Queen's  English.

I asked her  to clean fish make we cook stew, after a few mins by which time i felt fish should have been cleaned and salted i strolled into the kitchen and alas there was my titus fish being BOILED!!!

Boiled people BOILED!!!!

Fish wen i wan put inside stew oh....

She says my mummy taught her to do that!

I just dey look d gal with shock, I asked her if she's even seen me do such? She say she think say we wan fry d fish...
I say even then has she seen me boil then fry?
These girls dey foolish wen dem wan foolish sha!Ah ah

Another day while i was at work she decided to help my son with homework... i no send am oh, but she tries to be proactive.

My cousin said she heard her repeatedly say "curve and dash". On peeping now she saw them writing no 7 so she says Sulia, wetin be "curve and dash" and the silly gal says oh that's what mummy says when doing Ayobami's homework....

Obviously the bugger had heard me while i was helping Ayobami write no 2 and assumed 'curve and dash' is applicable to all nos.... ****eyes roll***

Thursday, 17 November 2011

Hazards of living in a face me i face you!!!

So i live in a face me i face you :D

Maybe i should even start a series on all my co-tenants!!!!

We've got 5 tenants in all....

Some co-tenant of mine whom i have a relationship with i.e we greet when passing each other in the yard ;)

She calls me aunty and considering she's married and probably 25ish i feel embarassed as in her calling me aunty probably means she thinks i'm veeeerrrrrryyyy old or something.

Anyway she sometimes brings her food over for storage in my freezer during long power outtages. She's got a small gen that obviously cant power her generator....

So that's about how much we relate- barely!!!


She's got a niece  who's about Ayobami's age, so when the girl comes around they play together. I usually dont mind. Anyway i recently realised that my neigbour and her sister(the mother of the little girl) obviously have no respect for boundaries or just choose to behave badly.

I find that the occasional visits from the little girl usually stretches into hours and hours. I feel it isnt proper to fob your child on people you barely know. To further buttress my point this  was what  happened a few weeks back

My neighbour comes and says " oh Aunty i need to quickly dash off to XYZ please can "little girl" stay here till her mum arrives at 10 or was it 11 am(cant remember well now) . This was probably around 9am ish. anyway i say no problem...

1pm and the girl mama never show. so i'm like wetin be this one now? meanwhile i don dey tire to do babysitter. I didnt even have the aunty or the mother's telephone no sef...

sha at about 2pm ish i send the kids down to ride bicycles and generally just get a breather, then i see little girl's mother about to go out!!! And then she says" ah i knocked on your door and no one answered" i want to go and make my hair. SHE MAKES NO MOVE WHATSOEVER TO TAKE HER CHILD ALONG.

i no talk.....

At about 7pm i was still saddled with this girl, aunty i no see, mama i no see. By this time i was furious and my voice don change... d gal sef don see as i change she begin cry. So i felt bad and calmed down a bit. I started getting the boys ready for bed and just left the girl in the living room, then her mum came and she refused to follow her or something like that and the mama turn back....

Ah ah  see me see something. Of course i charged and asked my maid to take her home only for that one too to come back and say nobody dey there...

I went straight to another neighbour to ask if she had their no just as i was still getting that information, the mother returned and i told her, the little girl was crying and i didnt know what to do....

You'd think they wouldnt show up at my door again abi?

One fine evening the boys were playing downstairs and little girl and her mother were passing by, next thing she leaves the girl and wakas off. By 7pm when i asked the boys to come in, her mama still never return. I ask my maid to stay downstairs with her. Like half an hour after i start thinking mosquitoes will be biting the poor child lemme ask them to come in....

Rain starts threatening to fall and her mother appears.... the girl once again refuses to follow her mother and the woman strolls off. This is past 8pm oh!!!!

I no just talk na look i dey look them. Thankfully she starts to cry again so i march straight down to call her mother oh, luckily she was there!!!

The next time we ran into the little girl, i sent her right back before she will have to spend the night in my house mccchhhheeeewwww

My hubby was there and he felt i shouldnt have sent her back. I did it tactfully mind you. This kain "oh little girl we are going home now, see you later"

He is of the opinion that it was the girl's refusal to go home that caused her mum to leave her with us endlessly. I am of the opinion that you should draw limits and boundaries for children especially when they're so little.

Moreso i barely know these people!!! I dont know their surnames sef so its not like we are friends in the first place.

what say ye?

N.B- Didnt realise the story would turn out this lenghthy!!!

Friday, 28 October 2011

Hair net- To wear or not to wear!!!

I hope i get some male perspectives on this discourse!!!
I grew up watching/seeing my mum wear hair nets.
I thought/assumed/believed it was normal. I was happy when i started wearing hair nets too.
Now i'm married with children and they too have started to watch/see/know me as a hair net wearer.
The challenge is this, i was once gisting with some friends and one mentioned a husband reporting his wife to her that his wife was a hair net wearer. And his main grouse was that the hair net constantly smelt of "dodo" i.e fried plantain. In her defense i said well better her net smelling of dodo than her brazillian weave on that cost an arm and a leg.
Some of my female friends have expressed concern about my hair nets.***eyes roll***
I am comfortable wearing them but i dont want to be a pain to my hubby you see.... truth is i find that many husbands dont always mention the things they dont like e.g wearing hair nets or tying wrappers around the house...
So hair nets....
... to be worn by wives or not?

Wednesday, 12 October 2011

Random talk talk again!!!

I have tried to put up posts at least twice but at the point of publishing the thing go just disappear!!

So much to say i no even know where to start!!!

My dear son has finally started proper nursery and its been amazing how he's suddenly so matured and a bit better behaved. he also blows some fone now and the other day was spreeing and oppressing his cousin and my inlaws only for him to say with plenty fone and in a loud voice "i didn't SAID it" oh well there went our super star moment :D

Tlash is cool too, quite grown up now and we have been attempting to toilet train but he screams so much at the sight of his potty..... maybe i should bust it till he can express himself? **rolls eyes**

The cost of diapers leaves me no choice anyway!!!


It’s bad to be broke oh… I'm really broke now so tey when my dear hubby promised to dash me money, I went and gave him an exceptional ;) (IMO) performance just so the money will be increased and since morning I have been doing oh darling, oh honey!!!

Women are so freaking materialistic LOL

Today i went to the bank and the security man said to me " welcome to Diamond bank" i was very uncomfortable by that i wasnt sure if it was geninue politeness or a ploy to make me tip him when i was leaving.... just shows how used i am to not receiving courteous service in this country. when security men start saluting and helping with bags and doors or even smiling i feel somewhat obligated to tip them..... i remember a few have even gone to the extent of saying stuff like " enjoy your meal", have a wonderful day etc etc i just keep cringing and praying i'd have change left to dash them....
Na wa
My hubby and I sleep in separate rooms. I find it odd in this day and age. Though sometimes im grateful for the "privacy". I sleep with my boys. It started with him saying my stuff were scattered and too much and he didnt want them in "HIS" room. Of course i took offence and started sleeping elsewhere. Then when the boys came he felt i should sleep with them since they're toddlers and need to be given milo and carried to weewee during the night!!!
Suddenly i have realised its killing our intimacy and i'm a bit tired of him coming to tap me, and in the words of my boss say "follow me to the room" . I mean i am not an "iya risikat" abeg.
The challenge now is this i really want him to apologise for what he said initially and ask me to move back in. i hinted him the other day saying i couldnt continue sharing a room with little boys ad he said " well you can dress elsewhere and not in front of them " ***rolls eyes****
enough for one day, make i dey go house! Work continues for some of us ;)



Tuesday, 13 September 2011

Random "talk talk"

One more thing I'd seriously like to know is why when you call some offices or walk up to a receptionist/security man and say I'd like to see Mr/mrs/madam/alhaji(etc) so and so he/she asks for your name and then says "from where"?

Sometimes i say from America!!!

Because i really just dont get it..... LOL

My fellow Nigerians in the diaspora is this phenmenom common "in abroad" too? ;)

I woke up early today to catch up on some ironing.... smallie woke up and i went to make him milo,of course before i returned the bugger of an Ayobami had thrown the hot iron on the carpet. Thank God there was no bodily harm to him or his brother.... he starts REAL(as in with uniforms and all) nursery next Monday!!! i can't wait to unleash him on his teachers :D

It's amazing the kind of levies parents are 'forced' to pay to educate children in this Lagos. all sorts of dues- development, christmas party, Yoruba classes, swimming all sorts my people. I was fortunate to find a moderate priced school with few students. They'll be just about 5students in the class. I just hope i made an informed decision!!!

May i also warn potential parents make sure you have your children before September oh!!!!! Most schools admit only children of age 3 (birthday has to be in September) into nursery 1 when the session starts in October.... the child will usually be placed in reception/pre-nursery/kindergaten class....

We were lucky though we got placed in nursery 1 because my son is exceptionally bright like his mummy :D ;)

Thank God i titled this post "random talk talk" (pidgin English)

Friday, 2 September 2011

Is it bad....

.... for me to still be smiling /winking plus day dreaming at fine boys/men in traffic?????????One caught me today and raised his hands as in "madam na wa oh " LMAO

The fellow was fine sha even though he's a light skinned man and theyre not my spec. It didnt help that he was being driven in an LR3 **winks**

Oh well....

Monday, 29 August 2011

This manager work no easy!!!

While i am grateful for my current job especially as it is somewhat better than staying home all day... the many things my eyes have seen i just must pencil down.

There is certainly a WIDE gap between a one man business and a multi national.

Our Operations manager is Ijebu by tribe and worked as a teacher before now. he has some really amusing theories about how things should run.....

For example : the toner for the printer must completely run out before another can be purchased. i find that absurd and certainly not the way to go. He accused me the other day of not being responsible for the maintenance of the pool car.... hello... i am not in admin and barely use the car anyway. I use my own car for marketing purposes. as if that is not bad enough i have to sign papers up and down the place before i get a refund on my fuel money....

The height for me is the lastest development. i have worked for seven months thereabouts and no one assigned me a laptop/computer. I used mine until it crashed.... several memos and lamentations later, my dear boss approves ONE for the marketing unit in addition to the laptop we currently have....

One as in ONE for we the three unit members. he claims it is a work station technically this means the three of us have to take turns to use it. we have two chairs on this table. so one person stands while the other two sit!!!!

And they say i am a management staff....

I shudder to imagine what the other normal staff must be experiencing.... mcsheeewwwwww

Wednesday, 6 July 2011

Too much Information and other stories :D

Long time no see....

My lappie crashed and i havent been able to replace it. One would have thought owning a BB would solve that challenge but truth is some of us are still technologically challenged ;)

So much has happened i tell you, i mean even Tlash is gonna be One tomorrow.... i wonder if he even is aware of that fact sef :D Never mind me and Ayobami know and are gonna rock on his behalf ;0

One of the many things that have happened to me are three embarassing incidents i just must share!!! My job as a MANAGER(you know now lol) requires me to go hopping from one office to the other. So i have met all sorts of receptionists from the haughty(i assume these ones think they are management staff) to the very nice and friendly as well as the next two i'd be discussing in the next paragraph!!!

While waiting to see someone in HR i got friendly with receptionist 1. I told her my need and tried to get some info off her. Next thing she starts to tell me how she attends Fountain of Life and can dream dreams... From there she says she dreamt that her sister was travelling and true true the sister went to abroad.... then one man that is thier customer and he's close to her. The man is close to Mike Adenuga( or his daddy sef) and she had once dreamt or seen a vision of herself working in Glo…. She wanted to know whether to ask the man to tell Mike Adenuga to employ her or some errant nonsense like that. Wetin concern me concern all that one?

The next one too started off friendly. By my next visit to the office she wanted to know what hospitals were good for gynaelogical issues and stuff(I work in health insurance). Next thing she starts to tell me shes had a previous miscarriage and while I am still squirming from discomfort she goes on to say in her current pregnancy too she started spotting and she went to a midwife/modern herbal doctor not juju woman according to her oh lol. She said the woman assured her nothing will happen to the belle. At this point I quickly told her of a good clinic and scampered off….. which kain thing be that????????????

The last episode was just the worst mbok

I was trying to buy some toys for ,my boys and the 2nd time I went to the shop to pick the items.i met the owner in a bid to be friendly I asked her if the baby I had met on the 1st visit was hers. So she laughed and said that’ll probably be her grandchild. Then she brought out family pics of them in Dubai showing her husband and daughter. And said she was celebrating 25years wedding anniversary or so… her friend who was there then said “ah you and Emeka have been together for so long” (or something like that). Then she says out loud in the presence of even her sales girls “ Emeka disvirgined me you know” . at that point I paid and ran out of the shop….

I mean am I wearing a sign that says ‘you can tell me EVERYTHING?

Tuesday, 5 July 2011

Hey.....

.... Missed you plenty plenty!!!

Will be back soon...

TLash turns one on Thursday we are busy planning :)

Wednesday, 11 May 2011

May Post!!!



Ok so here's the post for May :D

it is important that i at least meet up my one month one post!!!!!

I had actually tried to post several times in april but chasing two small boys and their father aint easy i must admit....

So here's a shout to my dear co-blogger "DOLL" congrats on your engagement( i'd have put this on your blog but i didn't want my greeting to get lost in the plenty comments ;) Wish you the very best babes.... Feel free to ask for tips and advice anytime too!!!

Here's the post now....

I was wondering the other day and i infact i'm still wondering why in this part of the world we call soft drinks "minerals" or actually "minerasssss"

answers anyone?

These are my random pics from my random wakas around Lagos....






This is apparently the new face of RRS in Lagos.... frankly i think they look like ants






My Darling MIL bought me this pot , it has my name on it :D







Saw this one in a Nigerian movie and i couldnt just help leaving my mouth agape.... read and re-read the last line!!!

Yep the VICTIM of this act will pay N500 LOL

Monday, 4 April 2011

Cocktail of gists....

This my one month one post system sef na wa ….
Today’s post is a cocktail of all sorts of gist….
Another habit Nigerians have which amuses me (not annoy this time) is when you say hello to people and they respond “fine”. LOL My assumption for this behavourial pattern is because the people probably expect to be asked “how’re you” and have already programmed their brains to respond accordingly…

Anyway whatever…

I’m still liking this Ibiluv’s blogging style. I’ll just keep copying ;) the worst she can call me is “copy catter” LOL

Memories anyone?

Had a tooth extraction few days back…. Still in pain and I’ve got a swollen face to show for my agonies… people seem to be staring at me a lot more now…. I imagine, they imagine I got beat up by my spouse…
For some days and even weeks now I’ve been trying to fathom what informs street traders on their choice of wares…. Even more strange to me is how these items are usually sold for a “season” and it seems by ALL street traders. Some items make sense(sort of) some I really rack my brain and wonder if they get any patronage at all. The seemingly sensible goods sold in traffic include:
The various variants of gala(packaged sausage rolls) i.e gala, beefie, meaty,rovers etc

Tissue for the car
Plantain chips
Fan ice/ Yoghurt
Torchlight
Chewing gum/sweets
Cuff links/silk knots
Fruit salad/pop corn
Audio CDS/DVDS
Men’s ties
Designer sunglasses
The odd/amusing ones include :

Camphor
Books
Rat glue/poison
Weighing scales
Machetes
Coffee tables
Dustbins
Cereals
Cutlery /knife sets

Plastic files/Folders
Swimming gear for kids
ID card tags/card holders
Jalabiyas
Male underwear/shorts


I wonder what they’ll have in the coming days/weeks….

I went to one chassis office today. I was quite awed… you see I worked in a multi national for many years and after my ‘job loss” in 2009 I had to somewhat stoop to take this manager work in a less than multinational company…. Better than sitting at home doing nothing I guess but I miss the days of “AC in the loo, properly set up work stations, fone speaking colleagues” etc etc
***sighs**** God dey!!!!!
The boys are fine. T-lash has 4 teeth now and my walls are gradually being filled with graffiti thanks to Ayobami. He can now “write” you see and always feels a need to prove this ON MY WALLS lol…. We also read/count numbers of license plates on all cars we see …..
What a brilliant boy I mean how many of you can identify nos 1-9!!!!!!!!!!

LMAO
I have been typing this post for a few days and now that I’m ready to post it I can’t think of a suitable ending….

Wednesday, 2 March 2011

New Post

I just dislike it when people say "I am strong" to communicate that they feel unwell. It really irks me....

I meant to wax my eyebrows today oh.... maybe tomorrow sha. Cant wait for the hot wax to be spread across my forehead lol i don dey kolo oh

i wanted to blog since and since but my friend's son was kidnapped it didnt seem appropriate to blog during such a period. Was too sad to function properly that time sef...

We thank God he was returned home safely last saturday....

I'm copying my friend Ibiliv's style of writing today ;) oh

I miss LG too wonder where she is sef, last i remember she was in Abj. Abi?

Person don dey old oh small small i don dey near 40.... i'll be 31 in a few months time.

If only i could just get my thoughts together and blog "properly"

My Commander and Controller are fine...

i was at my doctor's last week imagine my shock when he brought out his biro. Not only was it bic.... half had broken so the plastic that holds the ink was bare. Havent seen such a sight since secondary school... infact primary school.

Then his phone rang and believe it or not his ring tone is the Barbie theme song. You know the "i'm a barbie girl. in a barbie world" etc etc

Well maybe he doesnt know it's barbie theme song

Havent been able to take any random pics my Iphone was stolen

Been quite sad since

Especially when i think of the cost of replacement.

Ok what else is there to say...

I miss having sex

quite odd for a married woman i must admit

But you see that's how life is.... you cant explain many things!!!!

i better go now.

Maybe i'll be able to put up a more co-ordinated post in the near future

Tuesday, 1 February 2011

Journey to becoming a Lagos big gal.....

So further on my journey to reach my aspiration of becoming a Lagos big gal....

Today i went to wax my eyebrows....

No big deal abi?

Considering that even to apply lip gloss sef i no dey remember, that for me is one step ahead on this my "i must be hot in 2011" matters lol

Funny it wasn't as painful as i anticipated maybe i should go further and get a Brazilian? hmmmm

On Sunday i went to fix my weave.... not the Brazilian/lace front weave oh(still can't work out how to nip from No 2's cerelac allowance without getting busted lmao) so sha i spent hours there...

As in typical sunday salon moves, crowd there, only one good stylist and everyone wants HIM ALONE to fix thier hair etc etc so it took me hours to get done...

I didnt want Daddy going on about me turning him to a nanny and couldnt possibly take the boys to the salon so i arranged for my brother's girlfriend to baby sit...

I'm driving home and Daddy calls " Where are you?" "you left your children since morning to go and make your hair" "You are just going to work and not to do fashion(abi how the man talk am sef?)" "henceforth i COMMAND you never to leave the children and go to the salon again.... i'm not asking or telling you i am COMMANDING you"

na wa i get controller for office and Commander for house....

Na wa lol God help me which kain problem be this>????

Anyway i'm not to quarrel about the matter (for now) one day i will ask him whether i look like one of his staff that he is commanding me.... Men and their ways sef....

Monday, 24 January 2011

Random paparazzo 2



Maybe we can make this paparazzo business a regular feature on this blog... :D
I find some terms in my new place of work strange…. My boss is called a CONTROLLER Well since I am MANAGER surely that is the only way to show the world that he is my boss
Enjoy these random paparazzoooosssss my fellow bloggers




That's my neighbour at his gate....

Yep he will never RELEGATE!!!
That's No 2 browsing :D

Yes oh MOTORS are not allowed after 11pm and "latecomers" will be persecuted!!

Have a good week people

Wednesday, 19 January 2011

So i was tagged.....

and so here goes....

Thanks P.E.T for the award i feel honoured!!!!:D

7 things about myself...

1. I am still in love with my ex boyfriend.... ***sighs****
2. I really,really,really hate to see used match sticks on the floor
3. I am an aspiring Lagos big girl lol
4. I somewhat have OCD... i can arrange my wardrobe over and over(even when it's not scattered)!!!!! same thing with washing my hands :D
5. I can eat rice morning, afternoon and night, seven days a week. Happily at that....
6. My boys are my pride and my joy (obviously lol)
7. I'll have to come back to this!!!!


Award 15 other bloggers. Hmmmmmm i present this award to the 1st 15 commenters that stop by except they've already been tagged

Cheers people!!!!

Tuesday, 18 January 2011

So fluffy got a job…

I was quite happy to start work after sitting at home for a whole year just being a mum…
I miss my boys all day though 
Being a housewife really isn’t easy…
The high point of most days is in the evening when you start thinking of what to make for daddy’s dinner and then the process of making Daddy’s dinner.
One day I will compile my housewife tales lol and blog about them
So Lagos has somewhat changed!!!
Not like I was in purdah the past year but somehow I didn’t really get to waka much… with two small kids!!! Staying at home most times seemed the better option.
My former work environment had a casual dress style, so it really really made me complacent about my looks generally.
I’d have clothes in my wardrobe but I’ll just keep wearing jeans and one plain top or the other…
This time round (from what I see here) the style is formal/semi-formal. I mean to really step my game up oh… They made me manager… even though the salary aint exactly “managerial” lol ….
So I got myself a new haircut and colored the hair sef… being a mama doesn’t mean I have to slack biko… stepping my game up. Yesterday I wore a suit (for the 1st time in almost 5years),all my friends kept saying “what? You’re in a suit? Take a picture plsssss… felt like the thing would choke me at a point lol today I’m wearing the famous “abortion belt” to complete my ensemble and even though I feel like Santa Claus and cant really breathe I’m sucking it in and giving myself the Lagos big girl look lol
Next on the list is this Brazilian weave on… that’s the name ain’t it? I mean those lace front wigs that make Lagos chics look so hawt hawt hawt….
By the time I starve No 2 of his cerelac for 2 months I should be able to afford the thing abi? ;)
God help me in this 2011 abeg…. Na wa
Happy new year everyone(better late than never biko :D)

picking up the pieces 1

Picking up the pieces It may not completely make sense but I want to document this phase I passed through Sometimes life decides to hand...