It was just a few lines but the concept has refused to leave my mind...
All day my mind has been processing and re-processing how much "burnt toast" i have consumed over the years, especially as it relates to "man matters"
The way it works basically is this, you try to make a toast or toast bread, and for some reason either because you're distracted or you wander off it gets burnt.
Then you think what the heck and you begin to scrape the top, just so that you don't have to re-start the process of making another toast.
For some slices, you have to scrape and scrape till the entire first layer is off and what you have isn't exactly toast anymore LOL
In some cases you slather on loads of butter, margarine or jam to hide the burnt taste.
You know you're not enjoying the meal, but you sit there anyway and pretend to yourself that the meal couldn't just taste better.
For me, my last 'serious' relationship was full of burnt toast or better still was burnt toast.
The toasting process began quite normally, half way down the line, the bread got burnt and i knew it wasn't worth my while but i said, hey everyone else is eating some version of burnt toast anyway, so i better make do with mine.
I slathered on so much butter and jam that my heart is probably clogged with fat now;) and continued to deceive myself that, that was the best I could get.
I Pretended i didn't/couldn't see the black part of the burnt toast and instead said to myself and even others that the little edges that managed to remain white (-e.g the sex,hmmmm what else now?)were enough to make up for the charred bread i was forcing myself to consume.
Many years down the line, my cup finally got full and i realised that i really couldn't bear the taste of charred/burnt toast anymore.....
I found strength and inspiration from within and a little(ok i lie, a lot) from my friends( you know who you are;) Thanks once again, even though you may never have realised this, I owe you both:) and i kinda moved on
Because i was used to the burnt flavour, i went back to my vomit a couple of times. After rising and falling endlessly, and maybe even getting my fingers burnt severly by the toaster and toast in ways you'd never imagine.....
Finally i got rid of the toast and today i must admit i'm doing better than i initially started out even though i'm not at the mark yet, i have definetely come a long way from the soppy, silly and Lovey dovey chick i used to be .
Moral of the story- Once your toast is changing colour or moving towards being burnt, it's time to get a grip and move on!!!
Never ever settle for the "next best thing"