And if only....
I could turn back the hands of time
I would not have always hung around him like i had no other life asides with him
I would also not have got into so many "fights" just because i wanted to spend the night with him
Looking back now, i should have allowed him BEG me and done so only on rare occasions.
My bad,i thought it was good opportunity for us to bond.;(
Apparently he was never quite tripped by it.
I also would never have come clean about my real financial status(then). I thought we could walk that path together
I cringe every time he mentions "how i am unable to manage my monies"
All because i came clean and told him about my "investments that went down the drain"
I thought i was also doing the right thing every time i quarrelled with my folks just to be with him.
I didn't think he'd encourage me because it's not a nice thing to do i know.
But i definitely didn't think i'd ever hear him use these things against me.
I mean i did some of them for him!!!
Ah, and then there's the famous "I never tell him the truth" . True i sometimes did not tell the truth.
But really i do not know why i keep telling him things that are not true....
Maybe because he could be so so judgemental and nothing was ever acceptable in his sight.
All the energy channeled into making the relationship work!!!!
All gone down the drain.
Then he says i do not exhibit my values....
That he does not even know if i have any!!!!
Just imagine oh.
He really had a lot to say
Funny thing i really was not as sad as normally i'd be after talking with him, or more like receiving a lecture from him.
Guess i'm kinda stronger now.
Even now for the first time in a long time, i'm relieved we're over
I'm going to avoid him like a plague for a while to get my "head" back together
I've decided to be objective and accept where i was wrong and brace myself for the next boy that comes my way!!!
God help him.....
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